To Win, To Lose

Han Yeung

April 15, 2022

To falter, to disappoint, to lose, to fail.

To remember, to suffer, to strive to prevail

But fail, and dwindle, to stop, to lie

To wander, to weep, in anguish, to die

Trapped in a whirlpool, to be drowned like a fool

To be fooled cruelly, to be used as a tool.

An abyss, of no end, spiraling as I go:

Speechless, defenseless, reachless, sleepless.

In a corner, separated by an invisible border,

Disordered, no longer an adventurer or explorer.

Not foreseeing, not possible to find some meaning,

Screaming, wheezing, bleeding, beating.

Misleading. Retreating. Repeating. Deceasing.

They were, at some point, just mere words.

But now ignored, unfavored, unheard.

To blur, to cover, to forget what occurred.

Thinking, knowing, it was all deserved.

From hurt, to rage, to fury, to snap,

To lose control, to mindlessly attack.

To wander, to falter, to fail, to lose.

To try to find some kind of excuse

To realize my efforts were of no use.

To bury goals, and talents, and malice, and thoughts,

To begin anew, ignorant of previous loss.

Or live, to conquer, to rise, to write

To laugh, to play, to rest easy at night.

To work, to play, to ponder, to grin

To sit, to reflect, to breathe, to win.

But alas, you are the one to choose

Not destined to win, nor fated to lose.

To make mistakes and turn out like me

Or go out into the world, to see, to be free.

From a cage, of rage, deprived of light

Unengaged from reality, no will to fight.

To mock, to scorn; acting only in spite

To sin, to lie, to perish unliked.

Or to bear your anger inside a kite

Let it soar, while watching- immersed in its flight

To stand upright, your heart shining bright

To only head towards the highest of heights.

To never back down, always put up a fight

To recover after strikes, to defend what is right.

To respect, to be respectable, and to be liked.

To survive, to live, to see things right.

Finished, you either breathe; sighing aloud

Or huff, unsatisfied, as you sit and scowl.

To reflect on your life, feeling proud,

Or in disgust, spit on the ground.

Beginning to near, you become less and less

As you close your eyes and come to a rest.

To lose; dying, angry and stressed.

Or win; ending, with no regrets.